Ecclesiastes 9:11 read; "I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all." Things will not just happened to you because of your qualifications or strength but time and Chance will make things happen. God work with time, Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 says there is time for every purpose under the heaven. To this end, there come a time/period in your life for you to adequately prepared for marriage. Some folks waste their time and loose their chance in settling down in marriage.
To understand the topic "time and Chance in marriage" I will categorize life into three stages.
1. Morning stage (age 1 to 30 years)
2. Afternoon stage (age 30 to 60 years)
3. Evening stage (age 60 above)
The morning stage is the early stage of man's life. This is the stage where you begin to plan, as in business you engage in feasibility study on the kind of business to invest into. Thus, this is the best time to plan and get married.
The afternoon stage is the productive. It is the time for actual investement, planting, making impact, reproducing, cultivating and utilizing your potentials to it fullest.
The evening stage is call resting period. It is the period one ought to enjoy and eat the reward from both the morning and afternoon stage. Unfortunately, some folks are living their morning life in their afternoon, and living their afternoon life in their evening period. When they are supposed to be resting in their evening period, they tend to work, invest. They don't have time to enjoy and eat the fruit of their labour as they desire. If you loose your appointed time, your chance will be hopeless.
All things being equal; at age 22 to 26 years, a mature lady should be in a stable relationship. When she hit 30 years and above, it becomes difficult to get married in many occasions. Miss your time, miss your chance. Don't allow the personal desires you tend to achieve hinder your marriage. Example; the pursuit of your academic dream and craving for money. They are both important, but never the less plan your life, so that you will enjoy it to the fullest. From age 25 years, a mature guy should think of a stable and serious relationship; he should be getting set for marriage. At age 38 years and above, he is already late if not married.
I hold that the prayer point of "seeing your grand and great grand children" will be easier if you get married and bear children early. A man who married at age 38 years, had his first child at age 39 may not see his great grand children. If he is 60 years old (evening stage), his son or daughter will be 21 year old. At age 60, such man should be resting, eating the reward and benefits from his morning and afternoon life, but the reverse is the case. At 60 years, he still pay school fees and other bills, involve himself in school run and others odd activities that he could have done in the afternoon stage of his life. Such a man, when will his child get married and give birth? If the child eventually married and give birth, when will the seed give birth for the father to see his great grand child or children? Looking at this mathematics, we could see that it is difficult. God will preserve you with long life, but you have to play your path by getting married on time to enjoy the full package of the manifestation of your prayers. Do not allow money limit your preparation in settling down in marriage. Start preparing now. Though marriage is not an end itself, but it is a means to an end.
PREPARATION PROCESS (Proverb 18:22)
Marital life is individualistic, thus; go and buy for yourself. It is not determine by your parents, family, friends, Coursemate, classmates, associates, relatives but by you. Nobody will prepare for you concerning your marital life, you have all the preparation to make yourself. It is vital to prepare adequately and gather the necessary knowledge that is required. Preparetion proceeds performance! More time is needed to prepare than to perform. Your preparation determine your performance in marriage. Therefore, there must be adequate preparation; mentally, spiritually and in all spheres of life. Your decision today, will have both immediate and futuristic effect in your marriage. Leaving things undone early might adversely have negative impact in your marriage.
There are various ways for you to prepare, but I will categorize them into two, namely:
1. Spiritual preparation
2. Physical preparation
1. SPIRITUAL PREPARATION ( 1 Corinthians 2:14)
In spiritual preparation, you must develope mental literacy. Thus; they are:
1. Pray early: So long that you are above 17 years, start praying for your marriage. Turn the general prayers to specify need. Say what you want.
2. Build capacity on how to hear from God: Develope various ways to hear from God. If you can develop such capacity, you will be able to confirm or tell if the person is the right one.
3. Define your target: Your target should be of those in the same faith with you. It is wrong to go for unbelievers. Do not marry to change him or her, you are not the Holy Spirit. If you do, you will dance to the music yourself. Smile...
4. Locate a mentor: Your mentor could be your biological parents with good attribute, Pastor, or those with proven marital integrity and testimonies in their marriages. Any relationship that you can not relate with your mentor, is masked and God is not in it. Mentors are marital couches.
5. Identify and deal early with anti- marriage foundation (Psalm 11:3): Deal with negative powers behind divorce, polygamy, Idol worship, re-marriage, Single parents, Single birth, barrenness etc. Close the wicked doors. If you do not close the doors, you may repeat or end up like others in the family.
2. PHYSICAL PREPARATION
In physical preparation, the following points need to be considered;
1. Identify and deal with personal weaknesses.
2. Check for compatibility
3. Check for maturity
4. Financially stabilily, and
5. Check for Character.
I hope you were bless by this? You can share with others.
I value you
No comments:
Post a Comment